Yoshizen's Blog

Kill the SELF

If any Buddhism sect or their instructor told about “Self denial” or “Kill the Self” kind, they are a sham.  It was not what Lord Buddha taught 2500 years ago. 

(Lord Buddha taught “Selfless” through the practice though, as he didn’t explain the meaning or its intension, it was not necessarily understood by the followers. — Because of the SELF and its notion was not exists, it was not possible to explain. = Can you explain “Self is not exist” without using the word “Self” ?    😀 )  

In this situation, could anybody describe what about or significance of the teachings, or the meaning of practice which taught Selfless. = Hence, no description even in Agama. Because the matter was not to understand what the meaning of the word “Selfless” but become able to do the practice without thinking without emotion. ( = completely detouched, which mean without EGO ! )

There are many stories of Buddha’s silence or No-answer.   All those questions which was ignored were about the imaginary things, such as infinity, eternal, after a death, perpetual soul kind.   Because all those are the imaginary things = deluded by the “Self” which is not even exists.   Why bother answer it.   In fact, Lord Buddha’s silence = stop talking meant to be a message as strong as to kill the person.

Have you heard a very lucrative investment scheme of the Poca-pinta (10 poca-pinta is about $1) in the Pintaland, where you can buy 1 Kg of Gold for 1,000 Poca-pinta.  But to make a deal, you have to send $1000 into a Net Account first. = I don’t think you ever did because no Pintaland exists nor Poca-pinta. Naturally nobody uttered even a word Pintaland = because even the word “Pintaland” is not exists. —– Same as this, When the subject is not exists, no Lord Buddha ever talked about, let alone gave any answer related to it. 

By the way, were you aware to be the person who read this stories of Poca-pinta here. Was that YOU ?  And did you know the reading was done by your eyes.   In FACT, everything has been carried-out without you noticing it = “without noticing” ?   So, WHO read those ? —– Since when you were small, you’ve read the texts millions of times and now you can do it with no intentional intent.  You can capture a flashing message without reading it but just from its overall pattern.  Since, you DO it automatic, without conscious.   When you became Self-conscious, because of your EGO, “Me me me” you try to assert YOU and it IS only the situation you try to be Yourself.= Otherwise, in a normal condition, YOU/SELF is not exists.   And to read this, you don’t need to have your SELF.  Likewise, you can live your life without SELF.  It’s mean without having the ugly conflict of the EGO against EGO.

In the first place, Self wasn’t there unless you intentionally made-up.  Since, Dharma itself has no Self.

“The person” fist created “SELF” then clung to it =  because of own EGO, Me me me, — and made the life awkward.   Then try to kill it because it IS too awkward to live with.  (How silly.)

Aren’t  you doing the same ?  (You don’t need to pay an effort to kill the SELF, simply just live in a natural flow, there isn’t any SELF there as Dharma hasn’t one. —– It’s mean, You don’t need to struggle even with this blog = just read like as a casual gossip, though 100 times = if there is any truth, your intuitive wisdom will find it out.  If not just forget.)  😀


PS : One point shouldn’t be forgotten,— to give up a drink, woman etc and become a follower of the Dharma. — You may see it is a sacrifice and the denial of the happiness and pleasure of the SELF / Me.  Or, to get the excitement of a sports and a health, spend the time and money for the training — wasn’t that a price to pay, or a sacrifice, denial to the Self ? .  The matter IS which you value positive ? 


Hidden burden in BUDDHISM

Hidden is not necessary appropriate word.   To the people who is aware of it, it is nothing new but

because of it is not convenient or sound nice, it has been stashed away or intentionally ignored, hence

it was rarely talked about, —– YET, it is the most crucial element and the steps of which

a Buddhist had to take once in their pathway.


Go back to the Kisa Gotami story, —– What was her Contemplation ?

Was that just an acceptance of the life’s reality and the surrender to a force of the Dharma ?.

What was the meaning “Surrender” to the Dharma ? —– obviously, it is silly to stand against the Dharma,

therefore, it is no point to talk about the general condition of human existence, as man’s

existence is a minute from the beginning.

Superficially the teaching in the story of Kisa Gotami is an acceptance of the life’s undeniable reality= Dharma.

Yet hidden in the story, was her Self Denial —– not just accept the Dharma, but there was much more

personal, strong feeling of the failure, as a mother and a wife.

In fact, it was a rigid patriarchal society where a wife’s role and the duty was to bear a son.

A woman can assert her status only as the mother of the heir. Having her son’s death, she was

facing not only the grief of her loved child but a crisis to be branded as a woman of failure.

—– To accept the emotional trauma of both grief and the feeling of failure in fully minded

depth was, in deed her contemplation.

Discovering the harsh reality and found no possibility to find the seeds to revive her dead child,

psychologically she was stripped naked, left alone in the void of blank space —– she became

a clean blank sheet of paper, well prepared to listen the teaching of Buddha.

And Buddha knew she will reach to this state of mind when she come back. ( That’s why he sent

her out for a journey ) So that, when Buddha saw her come back without carrying heavily deluded

expectation and clean calmed face, he gave her kind consolation and the words of wisdom.


Often forgotten or rather intentionally ignored fact of the Buddha’s life is that,

once Buddha was a renegade of the ascetic holy man’s lank.

In order to soften the blow, this story was changed to rather positive description of that

Buddha found the better way to reach the truth, other than torturing the body and the mind —– though,

the eyes of the society then and to the mind of himself,  he knew he was a renegade until

Buddha found his own answer —– real truth and the way to reach there.

In the man’s life, anything has happened was, in fact placed there to be happened.

Same apply to the Buddha’s life as well. —–  If he didn’t join the holy man’s lank and learned among them

and then abandon its practice, the Buddhism today is not exists.

In other words, the elements and the experiences Buddha gained while he spent a time among

the ascetics, and  above all, the contemplation he got when he became a renegade was a key

to reach the Buddhism.

When Buddha abandon and let such practice go, he was literally a broke. no margin to retain

any ego or arrogance left, and having the deep blank space in his mind —– the mind was

completely open. Buddha was ready to configure his understanding from the deep depth of

his subconsciousness. ——————->  (read again and have enough time to visualize those words)

And Buddha’s blank space in his mind,  completely open subconscious inspiration was

able to see the invisible rules of the Dharma which we call  Panya Paramita.

Here the Buddhism was born.


It must be clear, it sound not very pretty though, a defeated completely lost mind, or utterly

desperate feeling of failure, —– utterly denied and hopeless ego, utterly powerless feeling

and so on, —– is the key to gain a blank space or completely open humble mind.

Which can be bracketed as a Self Denial.

May be not, not pretty, but sound rather dreadful   😀

But this is the key step to start to receive the teachings. —– hidden and yet another unfortunate

aspect of the Buddhism.

Yet, even The Great Teacher Buddha went through this, how can we avoid to take this step ?

Sound too much ? —– OK, I leave the analysis to the next post   🙂


Virtue of DHARMA — What ?

Deep in the bottom of Dharma, there is the Physics.  And the basis of Physics, there are Atoms

which behaves or having its tendency according to their structure such as the number of

Electrons they got.  And the Atoms are made by the Nuclear particles, which were made by

the Sub-particles —– and those Sub-particles seemed consist even smaller Sub-particles —– and so on.

( According to the theories. —– Yet, nobody knows the truth, or it seems to be the unknowable.   🙂  )

I don’t think I need to listing-up the names of those and pretend to know anything about it.

Just leave the matter to the Nuclear Physicists —– as I’m not.  I’m only an outsider and merely qualified

to ask a question to the superficial phenomena.

Yet this question must be the ghastly fundamental serious one.

” Is DHARMA virtuous ? ”

M m m ———— So far what I found, the answer is Yes.

But if we take a  Humanitarian stance,  it is not necessary benign.

This was the reason why Buddha bluntly defined it in his Four Noble Truth, The life is suffering,

getting ill and get old and die, even though we are covered under the Dharma.


Long since a question of where the notion of Virtue in the Buddhism come from, was a conundrum to me.

The general morality is a necessity to keep the society’s unity and the peace, in other words it is the

obvious commonsense though, when it comes to a critical tricky situation, such as who should survive

when they faced to a crisis, blink of mass extinction, demise of the tribe such as a famine etc,

the compassion to others etc —– where those human virtue came from ?

To make it as a human duty to be compassionate, which appeared in the Buddha’s teachings from  its

earliest period, together with Four Noble Truth —– Its suggest, Buddha was fully aware that Dharma

is not necessarily kind to the man, hence need to take our own measure of helping each other.

Otherwise, Buddha would have said  “Ask your God to help you”  like all other religion.

But Buddha did know, No such convenient things in this world.  Buddha’s eyes were seeing

much larger picture ( Not having the man in the center, but the Harmony of the Universe in total)


To see the nature and its evolutionary history, I can see the Dharma’s incredible kindness towards

the extremely rare existence —– the LIFE.

What sort of coincidence combined the some Atoms and created basic structural element like

amino-acid, and then simple virus / bacteria kind of Life form.

Far beyond the mathematical probability, while against the Principle of Entropy, yet congregated selected

Atoms and Molecules and to create Life, could not occurred in accident. ( —– If it was an easy occurrence

in chemistry, with today’s technology, artificial Lives could have been created already. )

Any moment in the history, in any global event, this process could have been halted and the Life could be

extinct long ago. —– But amazingly this history on the Earth continued till now —- billion of years,

as if there was a will to make it continue.

To make it continue, it is necessary the system of the existences has to be balanced,

ie; sustainable in today’s buzz word —– in other words intricate equilibrium has to be met.

This is What Dharma mean, and Buddha meant —– as only a part of the Dharma, man’s life

couldn’t be alone and troublefree —– In fact, the man’s greed and the arrogance to expect and

imagine  ” It should be troublefree”  is the cause of trouble in its own.

The balance is for the total system, not for the man’s convenience, since human is only a minute part of it.

Among the all the existences ( Dharma ), only but  the human, is having their own mind and the mean

to go against the Dharma’s Rule.

And this arrogant mind, greed is expecting more than the fair share of  which  Dharma allocated to man.

That is why the Buddha’s teachings says, to be humble and abandon the Ego / Self, in order to

achieve manifestation of the Dharma within —– Abandon the Self = Mushin ( Mind of No-Mind )

which mean let the Subconscious ( the reflection of the Dharma —> Please Refer to previous post )

to rule your life.

Like a compassion is in one’s Emotion / Subconscious (reflection of the Dharma ) inherently Virtuous. So, the

Virtue in the Buddhism teachings is not from the God or convention of the society,  but it is the Dharma itself. 

Hence, the teachings of Buddha is ” Not against, or struggle with Dharma, but live with it,

live in accordance to the Dharma.  It’s mean, observe it by yourself, and aware and listen the

Dharma deep inside of you.   And to live with the Dharma in Mushin, prevails the Virtue in you.

This is the Enlightenment, which lead you to the Nirvana”

When man-kind violated the Rules and destroy the balance of the Earth’s Climate Equilibrium,

the sea stream changed its course, and caused the heavy rain here and there.

Simply, the Dharma is adjusting new Equilibrium —– and, it happened to be in the Australia or Brazil.

It looks as if the Earth is intentionally giving a revenge. —– No it is not, it just happen to be there, where

no human used to live —– human is the one invaded the land.

Don’t exercise your Ego and Greed, and impose your own Idea. 

Virtue is not in one’s mind, but in the DHARMA.

Here a Paradox again, you can’t deliberately exercise Virtue, it’s appears in your Mushin.


Mistake in Philosophy — Answer in ZEN

You might heard a story to extract latent memory from a witness or surviving  victim, by way of hypnotism,

such as a profile of assailant or even from pass-by, the car number parked on the street then.

The car number may be utterly trivial and useless to a pass-by, still we may remember surprising detail.

They are the Subconscious Memory or our Hidden Data bank.

When we consciously watch the scene, we only pick up the information which we got interest.

And this selection is not consistent.  It will be biased by the preceding event, experience or a suggestion.

If you are interested in fashion, you may pay great deal of attention to the shop windows and

somebody’s style, but remember nothing else, as the mind was just stuck there.

But when our mind is free and open we can see the scene as it is, and able to memorize everything.

Of cause those data are not just visual, but also the information from other sensors, and the internal feeling,

subconscious thoughts as well, which has been accumulated since you are born.

From those immense amount of data, only minute part of them, which  matches to the precast category or

notion, it become conscious memory and it can be transferred to higher legion of the brain (New Cortex)

to be used for the conscious thinking process.

—– Hence, the data available to such as the linguistic, logical thinking process, are only a miniscule part of

the whole data bank, the answer or conclusion we make is always inadequate and ” Not the exact Truth ”

which we knew it. —–  So. we always say ” Don’t think in your head. Find the answer in your heart”.

It is obvious, our Hidden Memory, Subconscious Data bank retain the whole information of our environment,

and ourself.  In other words, the faithful picture of the world and the information of ourself / True Self.

And they are not just a static images but their dynamism, tendency and the Rules,how the things

work, and how this True Self has been behaving and prefer what etc.

Its mean, The Dharma / The whole existence and its Rules within, are all mirrored  here.

This is the very meaning of ” Everybody possess the Dharma inside”.

And literally the Self is a part of it, the Dharma, and as everything in there are without any

partition, no separate awareness watching the Self or Subject, there is no feeling of alienation.

———- Many years ago, somebody asked me whether a mad-man can have The Dharma in him as well.

I said, yes.  Because, even a mad-man got the same body and its function, feel the same pain,feel the

same hunger, see the same, hear the same, and may have more or less the same emotion — the process

of those information may be different, so that from the same image of black cat,  he may interpret it as

a Devil —– still, his Data bank having much more accurate picture of the world than his twisted thinking.

In the same context, even an idiot who lack the higher process in the brain, still having more or less

the same Data in his subconscious, it is nothing but the Dharma.

When we think, quite often we use a notion which we have imported ( in other words not emanated from our

own Data bank, but intellectually learned ), since it didn’t have the original source and the process to

deduce, it couldn’t have an accord to the person.  As a matter of fact, even a notion the person knew well

still,as its using the notion of the words, it is no more than a proxy.  The complexed idea having the situation

even worse.  Even an idea constructed from the own Data bank (which came from own experiences and the

observation) when it was  imposed to the phenomenon, it doubles the uncertainty. —— Observer and

be Observed.—– The word (a notion) HAPPINESS is just a name of category, so that, its realities has

millions of variations, and an observer is just one of 40 billions.

The certainty is only the statistical probability. There can not be any absoluteness exist.  Despite this,

Philosopher often impose his own idea to interpret a phenomenon.  Hoping, his words can covey

what he conceived. (and expecting others can guess the same )

Against this fundamental jeopardy, Zen abandons the conversion to the notion and the words.

( Hence, relying on the Direct Transmission)

And abandons the stance to be an observer, or more precisely, abandon to be an observer as an Ego.

When facing a phenomenon or others,

Zenist just open his mind in Mushin. (without Ego without Thinking—– hence no conversion)

And leave the matter to the perception in his Subconscious = Dharma’s judgement or reaction.

(As the Observer and be Observed are both naked, both of the Dharma fuse together.

And the equilibrium will be spontaneously prevailed in the accordance of the Dharma)

This is the Ichijo (Oneness) in Zen —— the answer to the jeopardy of the Dualism.




Posted in Buddhism, Emotion, Evolution of Mind, Meditation, Mushin, Subconsciousness by yoshizen on July 16, 2010

( This is the shortest summary of what I have explained in the past hundred posts )

Half of the troubles in one’s life are caused by  external situations or factors, which is beyond the one’s

control —– the one was in the wrong place in the wrong time.

Though rest of half were caused by oneself which are largely attributed by one’s emotion, including

one’s greed, sexual instinct and emotionally biased wrong thinking —– in another word, Delusion.

What  BUDDHA taught was the way to deal with those troubles by gaining the clear eyes to

see the situation  AND  the way to control one’s mind (include the Emotion and Instincts ).

——– so, it was the two-way approach, hence the complete package of the solution.

To see the world in the clear eyes with the understanding of its existences ( include the Self ) which are

constantly changing by the chain of cause and result,  is fundamentally rational and factual —— hence,

Buddhism never has a conflict with the science.  ( And the common sense.  😀  )


And to deal with one’s mind which is riddled with Ego, Greed, Emotion and  Delusion, Buddha had

adopted remarkably effective way of practice which can Re-program one’s  Subconscious,

therefore able to eliminate all the effect of those awkward Ego, Emotion etc.

This uniquely Buddhist’s way of practice is,  to repeat the same action or thinking for the tens of thousands

of times thence worn-out the Thinking and makes the action independent and immune from any Emotion.

By doing so,  human mind and the body learns to do it without involving thinking and the emotion

therefore, the action became almost automatic (since emotion is detached) and extremely refined.

And able to achieve the selfless state ( Mushin ) of  the one’s mind.

———- As the result,  the Person wouldn’t be shaken by the troublesome event,  and the Mind can handle

the situation without the interference of the Emotion or  Subconscious blockage,  even awkward trouble

can be solved in the very rational and calm manner.



Posted in Buddhism, Emotion, Evolution of Brain, Evolution of Mind, Mind, Subconsciousness by yoshizen on January 23, 2010

We tend to simplify the Notion, such as the Emotion, like thinking it as if it is only the feelings,  Sadness,

Joy, Anger etc—– just see as an indicator of the mind, thus totally missing the point of  its function behind.

The part of the brain which is dealing with Emotion is known as Limbic System,  which situated under

side of the Cerebrum, and just above the Thalamus where body functions were kept controlled.


Structurally, this part of the brain is the older or original part in the evolutionary scale ( sometime its called

Old Cortex ) therefore common  with other simpler animal.

(less number of Neural layers indicates this too ——primitive hence it is fundamental to the Life)

So, what is this Limbic System is doing as the main function.

Its function is to Assess the incoming signal (Information / Data ) according to the Self-interests.

Self interest is largely, the instinct of survival and own comfort. —— its mean, Ego.

( Though, highly developed human’s case, this ” Own comfort” include the feeling of  Achievement ——

of which target may not necessary immediately link to his or her own gain, and it can be very spiritual )


And the action which was triggered by a stimulus such as a visual signal of the danger,

the evading action has to be continued for a certain length of the time, (just out of vision  wouldn’t be enough)

it has to be kept by the chemical effects.———- (So, Adrenalin is high, tension is kept high )

Since the Limbic System is directly linked to Tharamus,  effects are mostly Physiological,and the

secondary Psychological effects must be a later development,  or even a cultural development and

the result of the Conditioning.  (When to laugh or get angry etc are depend on the Culture, so that

small children don’t have same Emotion.  They need to lean the manner,  how to react and should  feel !!!).

Programing of ” How One has to Feel”— is the basis of the development of  HUMAN like  human.

This is what we call ” ETHOS” —– since, it is in Emotion / Uncontrollable—– hence Imperative.

( Carl Jung called this ” Collective Unconsciousness”  though it is only the end result. He didn’t know why )

( Most of the people know only their own culture and  own emotion—– so, not aware of this)


To see a news “A boy was rescued after 8 days” may trigger an Emotion ” How lucky this Boy is” and

feel a joy,  or dreaded with a thought ” What a poor boy to spend 8 days next to the Death” —– is

depend on each personality,  still this news gave significant impression to both person —– as it

triggered their Emotion,  but if it didn’t trigger the Emotion,  this news couldn’t

even be noticed / insignificant Data to the person.

Even an exciting signal source such as a sexy object (person) may become boring subject after a while.

( Hence, ” Seven  Years  Itch” —— 🙂   )

———- Emotional perception is very subjective, hence changeable.  So the importance of the Data as well.

Selfless (so-called) is to handle the signal while  being Apathic to the Emotional Bias, which

bore out of the Ego or deluded idea.

And giving no significant weight to any signal, and treat all the incoming signal impartial is

The Open Mind. ( Sociologist’s Value Free )

Emotion is the part of Self-conscious feeling,  noticeable side-effects of the Limbic activity.

Before the Large Brain / Cerebrum evolved and took over the Decision making process,  this part of the

Brain handled the thinking function / assess the Data and decision making. —– Important fact is, its still

doing  this subconsciously —– Hence it makes  Double Layer System .

( Emotional feeling  may started like an  Allergic Symptom to alert the individual.)


In metaphor, the incoming signals were assessed and directed to each door. (One is a Trash bin)

And this signal leaving each foot print.—– Some of them might make very muddy big foot print,

even splashing sticky muddy water all around.  ( Emotionally drenched. It’s a mess.    😦   )

Buddhism is making this signal to tread quietly, leaving minimum foot print and the noise.

When the foot step become  silent,  the Buddhist can hear the minute sound behind.

And some experienced Buddhists can even re-direct the signal and prevent it goes into the

door of House of Horror.   —— (Shame, screaming Horror House may be quite exciting and fun   😀 )

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