Rules in Helping Others
Be kind to others, help someone in need. ——- What a nice words —— as the Words.
Though, when its came to the practice, there are loads of question arise.
If you are a Buddhist, there must be the fundamental understanding to pay a respect to the Dharma.
Therefore has to accept the manifestation of the Karma.
Everybody got their own Karma. ( Not only the Buddhists. 🙂 )
——– So, when something happened or you encountered and see somebody in difficulty and obviously
needs a help. If it is a very simple matter, it may not very complicated —— just give a hand.
Though, if the matter was very serious and the help may affect the person’s life or fate. ——– M m m ?
How do we know, if it does not interfere the person’s Karma ?
To live on their own pathway according to their own Karma is their individual birthright.
In the same time, we shouldn’t be obsessed by the idea of ” I’m helping others ” —— just help without
having any notion of help. If you do, you have to do it in Mushin.
Why encounter such situation, there was our own Karma working as well —— It was not just an accident.
———- So, where a Buddhist draw a line IN the Middle way ?
For such situation or even for the general rules to deal with others, I’m following a hose Rule. Give a help
automatically but ONLY once. ( Buddha said to have offered three times though I’m just a small man I can
afford only once. Any how we got only one life and only one chance, never able to try the same again ——
—- have you ever seen or heard the same person born again and did the same attempt and succeeded ?
No such things like reincarnation exists. —– yes, decomposed my body, the element must be re-used to
constitute another life form, well may be a plant —– what so ever —– like a hydrogen atom in my body
has been recycled, recycled billions of times since it was created in the Big-Bang (allegedly) though,
no same person had ever created or same mind / soul ever exists, since even the soul is the result of
own Karma and the Karma of this moment is never the same in second later. No moment stays the same )
If my help didn’t work, it is the sign, I’m doing wrong AND / OR it is the person’s Karma.
Struggling my way of help, believing this should work is the delusion. It may make situation even worse.
Observe everything include the self, in the completely detached eyes. So that never exited or panicked.
Other than technical difficulty, a sudden occurrence of blockage or short coming such as suddenly
mob-phone broken or train service halted etc is the sign of halt from the Dharma = stop it at once.
If the help is essential and when you are doing it in your Mushin, Fully Minded, strangely all other
factors work together as well. Others give a hand, conveniently specialist appeared etc etc.
So-called Devine Intervention really happen.
After the event, never contact the person unless the person gave me a contact.
( If the person is a stranger, never exchange contact unless the follow-up is the essential part of advice
——- avoid to touch personal matter as much as possible and limit only to the issue or problem itself)
It is the arrogance to see the result of the help. (such as ” Have look I’ve successfully helped this person “)
As the matter of fact only the person knows whether the help was really helpful or not.
If the person is not grateful and contact to say thanks, it was a sign of inadequacy.
Then, erase the memory of event other than the data of the experience (practical technique etc).
Above all, I myself have One Week Rule which is, even when I’ve offered a help for the project etc,
if it was not started or the person did not make a move within one week, its file is deleted —– so, I
will not retain the memory. If it is not urgent to the person, why do I need to take initiative and if the
person got yet another problem occurred, it is the sign, Dharma is not keen to its project.
Me to help a project lie on front wouldn’t have any problem though I wouldn’t undertake the person’s worry.
This is my way to live as a Zen Buddhist and live the life with light luggage.
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